Maybe it's ingrained in our memories from school days. That feeling of newness. Stiff new uniform and shiny new shoes. School bags empty and pencils sharpened. Ready to start again. Ready to re-fill our brains after long, lazy summers emptying them. Maybe that feeling of Back to School stays with us forever, and part of us will always yearn for something new on September the first.
Or maybe it's because the weather is changing. Maybe the nights drawing in and the cool feel of the air on our skin makes us think more seriously. That feeling of summer spontaneity starts to lose its grip, long hazy days are fading, and we begin to feel a kind of straightening up. A seriousness comes over, and we start to make plans for the future.
Or maybe it's just me?
I love September. September is way better than January for new starts.
Our girl is one.
We are recovering from the celebrations, of family here, pouring love and affection onto our little girl. Everybody gathered, partly to wallow in nostalgia for the past year, partly in excitement because she has grown, because of what is to come. She has taken her first steps, a little wobbly, a little clumsy, but determined. We are taking deep breaths. Steeling ourselves for toddler-dom. And welcoming every new milestone with excitement and smiles.
That is how I feel about life right now.
It feels like a time for starting again. Not just because the season is changing. Not just because our children are filing back into school, themselves starting a whole new journey of learning and growing. I think it's partly because my church has started a month of prayer and fasting. Seriously, prayerfully considering what is to come. It's like we're all taking a collective deep breath. Lifting up our future to God and feeling that tingle of anticipation, of what is to come.
What is to come?
I don't know. It is both exciting, and scary.
I love it.
I like the thought that we might start to stretch ourselves.
I have spoken recently on taking risk. On doing things that scare us. Because sometimes that's really important, to stretch a little. You know? And sometimes you need a prompt. A little nudge. A reminder. Don't forget this thing you keep dreaming of doing! Don't forget those plans you made! Don't forget the places you want to go to, the things you want to do, the person you want to become!
I like to think that God gave us seasons as a way of reminding us that it is time for change. Or at least, to check that we're on the right path.
I've been thinking about Psalm 130:
'I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in his word I put my hope. My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning, more than watchmen wait for the morning.'
In the Beth Moore study I'm doing, it says this:
'No more beautiful sight existed for the watchman than the sun raising its fiery head on the eastern horizon. The watchman could gather up his robes, store his weapons, kiss his wife good morning, and fall into bed with the relief of a job accomplished.'
This is how I want to be right now. Even more than the exhausted watchman waits for the first signs of the sunrise, so I will wait for God. Stood on my tiptoes. Watchful. Waiting for the first glimpse of Him. Poised for action as soon as it needs to be taken.
I can't wait to see where we'll go.